thought of you as everything, i've had but couldn't keep

i forgot the extent of my love for you in the beat of a raindrop's music.
though i knew that in the time where my question marked lips drip-drip-dripped worry, suffocating my thoughts with a cloak of hesitance... that love did not disappear. it was not absent, and in those few moments... instead of disappearing, it simply remained dormant; asleep as in the volcano that waits for its precious moment to seize the night. & as i burned my hope like acid, you just as easily took my poisoned fingertips and kissed each one with your love's delicacy. without even knowing what affect you held on me, my hope just as easily floated back & flooded the caverns of my knowledge with my love for you. and what you'll never know, is how many times in a day you hold the ability to do so.
whenever you rest your head on my shoulder and hold my waist with the ease of your hands, i remember that my overflow of vulnerability within your presence will never harm me, like it has before. instead, you take my fears and wring every morsel of suffocation out of them; & allow them to bask in the sun, collecting golden treasures of strength. whenever i catch your eyes staring into the very core of me, i feel the reflection of the collage of your apologies... & in that instant, i know you deserve to be forgiven for your former self. whenever you kiss me, you and only you hold the potential to emit a shower of permanent passion from every pore of my being. and whenever i'm within your delicately strong embrace, i know there's no other place in the entire world that holds the sense of warmth you do.
& in the end, you'll never quite know your affect on me. i wish i could reveal handfuls of what i see. if i could, i would catch the reflection of your eyes when they are pouring into mine, & melt it into tangible fragments i could hold in my palms. & for a few seconds, i'd give you a glimpse of that love; before inhaling it into the seeds of my soul so it could grow rosebuds of hope & forgiveness, pieces of me that were weakened in the fires of our past.

i wish i could finish this... but there will never be nothing to say, you teach me something every time i'm with you. but what will always be true and complete, is that i will love you, forever.